hello.
A few days ago, when my friend was giving me a ride back home after work, his bike's tires burned out and the engine died on us. We were left standing at the roadside with him sighing and me exclaiming how it is my flat ass's fault that I caused the tire to bust. I treated him to KFC popcorn chicken after that.

The next day, I spent the whole morning and afternoon sitting in SiMei starbucks (which gives really good service) doing up the Navy Yearbook. I went over to the printers in PayarLebar later that evening around 9pm and headed home an hour later.

Yesterday, my sister and I went for the second last rehearsal for a friend's wedding. The friend requested for us to dance for them during their holy comminution. We were obliged to agree then, only to find ourselves frustrated with our unprofessionalism and tacky moves. We are doing lyrical. And really, its just noob.

I wrote another song on the guitar a week ago, my cabin mates just shake their head and say, "It sounds the saame!" I know it sounds a bit cheesy and it really does sound the same cause I am only know a few chords. But ya, there is still more from where that came from and according to two individuals, I am a large cheese factor anyway. So, what gives.

This past month I have been doing quite a bit of errands and they are making me frustrated. I realize that is because I have stopped placing others before me and when I was doing stuff, I searched for self-gain (and did not find it). Giving in to selfishness is like a fat man eating ice-cream, you know you shouldn't but it is good. The fat in the ice-cream doesn't make you feel much because it is so much inside the dessert, but a few months after eating much ice-cream, you find yourself fatter and unhealthier until you like die from excessive fats in your heart or something. I am like a lot more pekchek now and I think it is because I have become selfish and greedy, leaving me dissatisfied.

I don't know what I want really. I mean I do but I know it should not be, but still. My life is so full of melodramatic moments. But not bad la, it makes me think. Maybe everyone's life is melodramatic, if you put aside all these routines and really reflect on yourself. Ask yourself like 'meaning of life' questions... ponder about it, write songs, blog about it.... then laugh at yourself and feel stupid cause no one really likes others to know that they have become over-sensitive and hyper self-concious and a bit depressed. But they are real feelings. It just sounds wrong, awkward, TMI and cheesy when you blog about it. Especially in a white template and a website that calls itself 'THE WHITE TABERNACLE.'

I know this post sounds like a joke, but I am very much serious about me feeling selfish and frustrated. So don't laugh. It is not nice.

Okay wait, I mean only I can laugh. I mean, after writing these blog posts on my word document, I always end up feeling stupid and contemplate to publish the post or not. It is the part of feeling what I said is stupid that makes me realize that what I have been feeling for the past month or so is just cheesy and stupid and small and insignificant. So blogging and allowing myself to look cheesy is actually quite therapeutic.

Cool. I just dissected myself. Amen!